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That book I am reading? We have now gotten to the real horror show. (I only read on the subway when I commute, so yes, I am a poky reader. It just draws out the fun.)

Their ship has sunk. They managed to get most of their supplies and everyone (including the kitten!) off onto the ice floe, where they have made camp. They can see land, about 85 miles away. They decide to make the journey in relays, having an advance team set up a base camp with supplies on the island, and leave stores cached on the trail for when the rest of the party makes the trek. Perfectly logical, sound plan.

Nope.

DOOOOOOOOOM.

This would be a perfectly sound plan in Antarctica. But this is not Antarctica. This is the Arctic, where it is a sea. Ice floes constantly churn into each other, cracks form then close up, thirty-foot tall pressure ridges erupt out of nowhere. And, most unfortunately, the most stable part of the ice is farthest from land. As you get close to land, the ice churns a lot more, and there's a lot more open water. It's breakers, basically, only worse.

So the advance party--their leader aggravates an old injury and dislocates his kneecap. They get within five miles of the island, which they realize can't be the island they thought it was and is an even worse place to be stranded, but they can't get across the water. The leader decides to leave four guys with the supplies to make it to land, then takes the sleds, the dogs, and the Inuits and goes back to camp. Yeah. Guess what happens to those four guys?

Subsequent attempts at trips to the island end up with people falling through the ice repeatedly, chasms opening up under tents, dogs getting separated on the wrong side of open water when a floe breaks up, and boatloads (or, I should say, sledloads) of their irreplacable supplies falling into the ocean. And you've got things like people cutting their hand on a tin of pemmican and dying from blood poisoning.

There was a description of frostbite that made me make this face on the PATH: o.O

At this point I'm amazed anyone survived at all.


So of course I spent this morning researching Arctic cruises. Yes! I want to cruise the Arctic! All the disclaimers on the website have not put me off!

Embracing the unexpected is part of the legacy –and excitement – of expedition travel. When travelling in extremely remote regions, your expedition staff must allow the sea, the ice and the weather to guide route and itinerary details. The above is a tentative outline of what you’ll experience on this cruise – please be aware that no specific itinerary can be guaranteed.

Consult your physician about effective seasickness medications and their possible side effects. Before you leave home, please read the dosage instructions.

No camping experience is necessary, because camping in the polar regions is unlike any camping done in other parts of the world.

(There's also a whopper of a liability waiver.)

I'm pretty sure I'd spend most of the time ridiculously seasick and the rest scared out of my mind. I still want to go. Course, these are some expensive trips. Not to mention the thousand dollars of gear you'd need to buy...that they'd be quite happy to sell you, of course. (In the photos, everyone is wearing the exact same parka, sold by the tour company.)

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