ivyfic | (no subject)

I love Roger Ebert. From his review of Twilight:

Come on now, what is "Twilight" really about? It's about a teenage boy trying to practice abstinence, and how, in the heat of the moment, it's really, really hard. ... If there were no vampires in "Twilight," it would be a thin-blooded teenage romance, about two good-looking kids who want each other so much because they want each other so much. Sometimes that's all it's about, isn't it? They're in love with being in love.

Edward is 114 years old. He must be really tired of taking biology class. Darwin came in during his watch, and proved vampires can't exist. ... He rescues Bella twice that I remember, maybe because he truly loves her, maybe because he's saving her for later.

Why do girls always prefer the distant, aloof, handsome, dangerous dudes instead of cheerful chaps like me?

And he still gives it 2 1/2 stars, because Roger Ebert, unlike almost any other critic, understands genre expectations and know that this will be candy for its target audience.

From other early reports, sounds like this will be a fantastically terrible movie to watch. Still won't pay to see it in theaters, though.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Yes, we're not allowed to give money to Mormons at any rate. You're, of course, free to spend your time on whatever crap you like, just not money in this case.

Well, it's not worth seeing in the theater. And it's not worth a $5 rental. Or a $3 rental, really. Hell, I'm not sure this movie is even worth torrenting, honestly...

Free streaming on Netflix, maybe. At

ivy03's party for how crappy this movie is?

No, probably not even then. I'd have to be so drunk, I would only embarrass myself. I'm not killing my liver for shiny vampires.

Hypermasculinized fascist 'heroes' on the other hand...

I'll netflix it. That way I'm only paying the opportunity cost of not having another film.

Ok, when you do? Throw a party. We'll have some booze and yell and throw popcorn at the screen. It'll be awesome.

Definitely. But if there's popcorn throwing, we're doing it at your place. :)

But your place is already messy!

My place is cluttered. It does not have popcorn strewn across the floor, thankyouverymuch.

Also, we've got a wall behind our tv, so there's a limit to how far the popcorn can go. If we were really good, we might be able to get popcorn all the way to your bedroom...

Works for me.

AHAHAHA. I can't BELIEVE I didn't make the abstinence connection until I read this review, and the NYTimes review (which states it blatantly) here: http://movies.nytimes.com/2008/11/21/movies/21twil.html?8dpc. They'll be showing this in abstinence only classes right before they take the pledge and get their rings. HAHAHAHA.

I <3 Roger Ebert so much. He is brilliant. Did I mention I love him?

Also, that movie... yeah.