More RPattz

Apr. 2nd, 2009 02:13 pm
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Please let this not be an April Fool's joke. Not that I won't be sad to see his pretty face any more, but from all the interviews and commentaries I've heard from him, he needs to do this to stay sane.
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More RPattz from the Twilight commentary.

The director is talking about how Robert actually played the piano, and how talented he is at that.
RP: I don't understand people who throw balls.

In the kissing scene:
"This is quite difficult because I have a really flat head, so it's quite difficult to get a correct angle. ... Sometimes I feel like my head's being turned inside out, like the episode of Ren and Stimpy when he's inside his own belly button. ... I don't normally shave, because I have one of those butt chins as well. It's weird. Like a nubbin."
Through all of this, the director and Kristen are like "uh..."

RP: Don't put that on the DVD. I'll sue.

RP: Oh, I'm reeeeally scary in the baseball uniform and the bouffant hair and the sculpted eyebrows.
CH: (very whiny) Roooob! Stop it!

RP: I don't understand. Why doesn't he just kill her then?
KS: Cause Edward's in the car.
RP: But he wants to kill me, too.
More bad attempts to explain away the plot hole by KS and CH, which RP legitimately shoots down.
CH: It's not for you to understand!
RP: Just say the lines, puppet!

RP: I look twelve. I thought I'd gotten past that.

RP: I look like an anime character!
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I am watching the Twilight audio commentary for the lulz. Cause they have RPattz on it, and clearly someone has spoken to him about what he can say in public, and clearly he just can't help himself. His first statement:

"I have comments, but I don't think they should be recorded."

Later, we get:

"I've aged like six years. I look all haggard. You might as well recast."

"Sometimes I look like I've had facial reconstruction surgery for burns. It's like my whole head has had a facelift. ... A really bad one."

"This is the point where I just ran out of the theater. I couldn't handle it anymore." Yes, that's right, RPattz left in the middle of the premiere because he couldn't handle watching the movie anymore.

RP: I was crying in my trailer that night. I was in a really weird mood.
Kristen Stewart (Bella) and Catherine Hardwicke (the director) talk a bit about crying and stuff.
RP: I hate it when people cry around me. I'm not friends with those people any more.
KS: But you just said you were crying!
RP: I was crying over something legitimate!
CH: You know, we're all taught that we have to keep our emotions in, to stay in a little box--
RP: I would love to be in a little box. You know those people that can fit in really little boxes? I would love that.

Signs that this is a low-budget film:
When they talk about the auditions, they mention that they were in the director's garage. Classy.
Half the time when somebody new walks in, the director points out that they're wearing either their own clothes, or one of her shirts. Even RPattz is wearing some of his own t-shirts. I didn't think they did that in film, because you need doubles for continuity. But apparently they did that in this film.
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I love Roger Ebert. From his review of Twilight:

Come on now, what is "Twilight" really about? It's about a teenage boy trying to practice abstinence, and how, in the heat of the moment, it's really, really hard. ... If there were no vampires in "Twilight," it would be a thin-blooded teenage romance, about two good-looking kids who want each other so much because they want each other so much. Sometimes that's all it's about, isn't it? They're in love with being in love.

Edward is 114 years old. He must be really tired of taking biology class. Darwin came in during his watch, and proved vampires can't exist. ... He rescues Bella twice that I remember, maybe because he truly loves her, maybe because he's saving her for later.

Why do girls always prefer the distant, aloof, handsome, dangerous dudes instead of cheerful chaps like me?

And he still gives it 2 1/2 stars, because Roger Ebert, unlike almost any other critic, understands genre expectations and know that this will be candy for its target audience.

From other early reports, sounds like this will be a fantastically terrible movie to watch. Still won't pay to see it in theaters, though.
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Nov. 15th, 2008 11:30 pm
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For anyone who's read Twilight, or heard about it, or is wondering why everyone's so obsessed with it, you have to see this interview. )
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I've been seeing lots of commentary on Breaking Dawn, particularly how poor a role model Bella is. Without being spoilery, there are some specific plot points of that book that are obviously the source of the objection.

But that gave me another thought about Twilight… )

ETA: P.S. I am totally overwhelmed with a number of things right now and so am, of course, using my precious, precious time to obsess over this book that I hated. Go time management skills!
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Ranty mcRant on Twilight and the lack of perspective of teenagers )

This book is chock full of the peculiar myopia of teenagers—the one that leads to angsty poetry. Bella repeatedly chooses to isolate herself in the belief that someone should swoop in and offer her something better (which is exactly what happens). Eventually most teens gain enough perspective to realize that if they weren't so insistent that they deserve a better life they just might find the life they've got isn't so bad. That perspective is nowhere in these 500 pages.

That this book is so immersed in this immature teen fantasy is undoubtedly why it sells so well. That is also why it's utter crap.


Aug. 6th, 2008 02:23 pm
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Here is my mini recap of Twilight )

In conclusion, five hundred pages and NOTHING HAPPENS. Lamest. Vampire. Novel. Ever.


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